Thirty-three

Dear single people, here is a simple equation to keep in mind: procrastination + excuses = fail.  For example, I was recently in Ireland for ten days and kept putting off asking someone out until almost the last night.  The excuses I used were "I have 9 (then 8, then 7, then 6...) more days." "I'm only in Dublin for two days, I'll wait until I get to Adare." "I don't to get see these people very often, and I don't want to waste my time on a date." "My parents are standing right next to me."  I'm pretty sure that last one is a very valid excuse, though.  My point is, seize the day!  If that day doesn't exist, create it and then seize it!

I was in Ireland for the wedding of two friends.  The couple had a band play at their reception and asked me if I would sing a song with the band.  I told them that I would and hoped that I wouldn't botch up "Walking on Sunshine."  The guy in the band that accompanied me fit some of my important, superficial standards: young, attractive, longer hair, and in a band.  Since I only had one day left he seemed like the most viable option, so when the band was packing up I made my move.  I thanked thirty-three (or better known in Ireland as turty-tree) for helping me out with my song and then made a joke about when the next band practice was and if I needed to be there.  Then I asked if he lived nearby and would be around to go for a drink the next night.  In a charming Irish accent (every man sounds more charming if there's an accent involved, right?) he told me that he lived in the next town over but that he wasn't available to meet me.  Lesson learned: when I procrastinate, I end up asking out a guy that has fingernails longer than mine (maybe he uses them as guitar picks, but they still creeped me out) and run out of time to go on a date with any Irishman.

For the record, earlier in the day I had my sights on a guy.  Then I found out he was the priest.  True story.  In my defense when I first saw him he was wearing a track suit; attractive, charming priests should always be required to wear their collar or some visible identification.