Update: 20-29

While my odds are improving, I feel like my theme song should be "Call Me Maybe."  Seriously, the chorus is "Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my number, so call me maybe?"  Classic example of life imitating art or vice versa.  Maybe I should just go up to the next guy and play the song for him and hand him my number (I actually kind of love this idea, so stay tuned).

In case you've lost track, here's where I stand with 20-29.
23 was a tourist that was leaving out town; I changed my mind about 25 as soon as I asked him out and walked away before getting an answer; I never heard from 22, 27, 28, or 29

20 - We went on one date, which I think went well.  We see each other at church and have hung out in group settings, but that's all.  He definitely isn't interested in being more than friends, so I guess I have a new friend.

21- I pursued this guy relentlessly for no other reason except that I refused to admit defeat.  We finally went out once, and then I invited him to do something a second time and he said he'd let me know.  The day of the proposed meet-up, I asked him if we were on...he said he thought it was the next day, and that it wasn't going to work for him anyway.  I moved on from him.  Negative points for flakiness and me doing all the chasing.  Double negative points because he lives in Berkeley, which I consider to be long distance.

Reverse - I went out with him three times for some unknown reason.  He was always a gentleman, but we had very little to talk about.  As far as I know he has moved to Portland because I haven't seen him or heard from him since he came to the salon for a haircut I arranged for him (the haircut, by the way, ended up being pretty much identical to mine - which I find hilarious).

24 - Even though I knew 24 and I wouldn't make it long term, I was excited about hanging out with him.  However, after the third date he basically said he didn't have time to invest in something short-term.  Since I like to be friends with everyone I invited him out a couple weeks later when I was in his neighborhood by sending him a text, "I'm out in your neighborhood.  You should come by if you need a drink after work." His response was, "Let's be real.  There are million guys out there who want to be with you.  Give one of them a chance.  I'm not him." Thanks and ouch, buddy.  I kind of wanted to send him a vicious text back, but I kept it mild, "Yeah, you made that clear.  I just have a habit of trying to be friends with everyone."  Then I promptly deleted him from my phone.  I know I'll eventually see him around and I'll still try to be friendly, though.

26 - I've gone out with him twice, but I'm going to let this one fall through the cracks because (a) our schedules don't coincide and (b) his three invitations have been for me to come over and cuddle and stay the night.  Maybe I'm being harsh, but really?  Those are your only ideas?  Also, maybe I'm stereotyping all guys here, but I don't think he means "cuddle" when he says "cuddle."

There you have it, I have gone on more dates in this set of guys than I have in my entire life.  Exciting!

Twenty-nine

First of all, if you ever have the chance to go Bhangra dancing, DO IT!  Second of all, while I was practicing my sweet Bollywood moves, a guy stopped near me to search the crowd.  I leaned over and told him, "The people in charge said you need to be on stage in five minutes."  He went along with my lie and replied, "I told them I wasn't performing tonight but thanks."  We laughed, I continued dancing, and he proceeded to search the crowd and finally wandered off.

Never fear, he eventually made it back to the space I had claimed as my personal dance floor.  I never decided if he actually had friends there or not, but he was definitely dancing and enjoying the scene.  It's rare to find a (straight) guy that's just dancing to dance, but it was happening.  We were both in our element, so before I left I gave him my number and said, "We should go out dancing together.  Call me."  I think that's the simplest I've ever been.  We'll see if it works.

Twenty-eight

I went out dancing for the first time in over a month (which is just a sad, sad record for me).  It felt so great to be spinning around on the dance floor, but before I let the music take over my body I met Twenty-eight.  He and his friend were standing near me, so obviously I needed to talk to them.  I began with, “Hey guys, sorry to bother you, but I surveyed the people here that aren’t dancing, and they said they won’t start until you guys hit the dance floor.”  Twenty-eight promptly replied that they weren’t prepared to go on until 11.  Banter initiated, we chatted back and forth until my feet insisted on taking me to the dance floor.  I made sure to check in with them during my time-outs for water, and Twenty-eight and I briefly danced while he waited in line.

However, later he disappeared and his friend said he’s like a ghost and always sneaks away without saying goodbye.  I told him, “Well that’s just unacceptable. How am I supposed to ask him out if he left.  Let’s send him a message.”  So the friend saved my number, sent it to Twenty-eight with the note, “You forgot to get my number before you vanished.  Call me and take me out on a date.”  The next day I was excited to get a call from a random number, but it ended up being a telemarketer.  Stupid telemarketers.

24.3 & Possible Conclusion

I haven’t really talked to or seen much of Twenty-four in about a month.  After our second date things seemed to fizzle…I asked him out a couple more times, but he was always busy.  Since he didn’t ask for a raincheck or ask me out in return I decided he must be over it.  Then I saw him at the café, and we chatted about his upcoming vacation; things seemed fine, and I thought, “Ok, friend zone it is.”  He left for a few weeks, but when I finally saw him across the street again I welcomed him back and he gave me a hug and told me about his time away.

I decided I wanted to give it one more go, and see if there was anything there.  So I sent him a message to see if he wanted to go for a neighborly stroll or grab a bite to eat in the next few days.  I figured if he said no, then ok nothing else is happening here; if he said yes, I’d see if we were in the friend zone or more.  He replied that he was done with work after 10:30 and asked if we could just get carry out and a movie.  By the time he made it over it was almost midnight.  Now I know in most people’s mind that basically equals booty call, however, I don’t generally fit into the category of most people.  I totally wasn’t thinking booty call – I really just wanted to watch 21 Jump Street. We sat a respectable distance from each other and enjoyed the movie, but as soon as the movie ended Twenty-four leaned over and finally gave me a proper kiss.  Of course, we made out, but I was sure to tell him that I was not going to have sex with him.  He said that was fine with him because sex just complicates things.  In the end it turns out, he thinks I am complicated.  Post make out conversation…

24: So what was your plan tonight? What did you think was going to happen?

Me: I didn’t know if you were still interested in me because we hadn’t done anything in a while, so I figured we’d watch a movie and either officially be friends or maybe make out.  I definitely wasn’t thinking booty call.  No offense.

24: Of course we haven't done anything, I haven't been in town.  But I didn’t know what to think since you were telling me to come over so late.

Me: I wanted to hang out with you, and that’s what time you were off work.  I didn’t think anything about it.

24: I just don’t know what to think about you.  You’re so aloof all of the time.

Me: It’s simple – I think you’re a nice guy, but I’m not looking for a relationship.  Plus you’re planning on leaving and traveling for a while.

24: Yeah, but that’s not until March.

Me: So we can have at least three more make out sessions before then. 

24: See.  That’s what I’m talking about.  You’re never serious.

Me: I’m not trying to be complicated.  If you want to be friends, that’s fine.  But we could also be those people who hang out casually and make out now and then.

24: No, this is probably the last time for that.

Me: Really?  That stinks.  Well, I had fun.

He just laughed and shook his head, then we slowly transitioned back to a normal conversation, and when he left he kissed me goodbye.  Apparently what I consider simple is too complicated for Twenty-four.